Nothing takes the wind out of your sails like getting killed by grunts.

It’s happened to all of us at one point or another. We play a game for a couple of hours, get distracted by something new and shiny, and then attempt to pick back up the first game a few months later. Typically, at this point, we’re past most major tutorials. We may not remember what we’re supposed to be doing at all. We’ll resort to looking at controller configurations in the menus and do nothing for a few minutes but press every button in an attempt to trigger remembering how to play. We’ll die a lot at first, and either one of two things will happen: we’ll find our groove back and continue with the game or put the game in the pile of never to be played again, but we say we’ll start it over some day.

Last week, this game for me was Batman: Arkham Asylum.

While I have nothing pressing for the next few weeks or so, I’ve decided to take this opportunity to clear out some games from the stack of shame. Last week, I finally finished Halo 3: ODST, and then I decided I needed to finish Batman: Arkham Asylum. I’ve already started it, I’m not that far into it, so it’s time to play it and clear it off the stack. I’ve only played the game for 2-3 hours tops, but apparently a lot was taught in that time. I could not remember how to do anything, and unfortunately, none of the takedown button combos are in the controller configuration menu. They’re also not in the strategy guide, which greatly disappointed me the most. Those who have played know how important it is for Batman to execute ground takedowns (obviously the inverted and silent takedowns don’t require button combos, just certain situations to trigger them) while fighting and while taking out armed convicts. It shouldn’t surprise anyone to learn that I died more in the first 30 minutes of playing last week than I did the first time I played the game. At the very least, it was easy to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

Normally, with my level of zero patience, I’d rage quit or start the game over completely. But for some reason that day, I was determined to get back into the swing of things. I relearned how to do a ground takedown by accident, which has greatly improved my enjoyment of playing. I’m still not very smooth or fluid with combat, but I think with another hour under my gaming belt, I’ll be okay.

With this experience, I can’t help but obsess over another game I have sitting in my stack of shame unfinished. If I’m this rusty after putting down Batman: Arkham Asylum after only playing the game for a few hours, how horrific is Dragon Age: Origins going to be for me when I pick that game back up? I have well over 20 hours logged there and I haven’t played it in well over a year. I have a feeling I’m going to have to start a new game to relearn how to play via tutorial before jumping back into my old game. I am not looking forward to that, as much as I want to finish that game.

Believe it or not, I have reviewed the strategy guide for DmC: Devil May Cry. However, my MacBook Pro decided to DIE once again last week, effectively leaving me without a computer that has my images, my docs, my data, you name it. I really need to get better about storing things to the Cloud. Or I can have a $2000 computer that actually works like it should. I will hopefully get it back this week with minimal financial damage. If it’s the motherboard once again and they try to charge me for replacing it within 3 months…oh, everyone should feel sorry for the Apple Store Genius who will unfortunately incur my wrath. Since my laptop would not turn back on at all, I couldn’t even back it up before taking it in, a fact that scares me beyond belief.

But let’s get to a happier topic, shall we?

Since my jovial staff are working on reviewing strategy guides releasing in February and I have nothing on my plate until March, I figured this would be a perfect time to chip away at my stack of shame that sadly keeps growing no matter how much I work on it. I feel like I should name it Sisyphus. At least, I feel like Sisyphus when I look at it.

I’ve started 2013 with the one game I have promised numerous people I would tackle first with my stack of shame: Batman Arkham Aslyum.

After podcasting cohort Ross added Arkham Asylum in his Top 5 Stealth Games, I was instantly put on guard. I know Batman doesn’t kill anyone, and I know he has to move in shadows to get his takedowns, but I never heard once from anyone that the game was considered a stealth game. Both Ross and Blake pleaded with me that it’s not really a stealth game, that it’s more of an action game with stealth elements, even moreso than the Assassin’s Creed games. Despite my reluctance, I gave it a chance, and by the time I officially had control of the Caped Crusader, my hands were really sweaty.

I’m not that far into Arkham Asylum (long story), but what I have played has felt like more of a puzzle game, almost like Portal, than it does action or stealth. I say Portal, because with Portal, you had to be stealthy on occasion when in a room filled with turrets. You had to use the layout of the room to successfully take out each turret and hopefully not be seen by any of them. Chell can take bullets as well as Batman can. Sure, at least in Portal the turrets didn’t charge after you, but they were often so well placed, they really didn’t have to.

Every room I enter feels like a new puzzle, even the areas that offer no encounters, just exploration, as most of these areas have plenty of Riddler’s Challenges. It’s unlike any game I’ve played in recent memory, which is a great thing. As much as I love my shooters and my RPGs, it’s always nice to find joy in something completely different.

I really need to stop exploring so much for these Riddler’s Challengers and collectibles if I’m going to get through this game and hopefully one other game before March Madness begins. I’ve been told I can beat it in less than a week if I burn through it, but uh, that doesn’t seem to be happening. I get distracted way too easily.

This is why I have avoided Skyrim like the plague!