Terrible on console. Just. Terrible.

I am by no means a member of the PC Master Race, because I love gaming as a whole, but I know that not all PC games can transition to console and vice versa. And when I say vice versa, I mean go from controller to keyboard-and-mouse, because I’m well aware you can you use a controller to get through console games ported to PC. This isn’t the point. What I’m saying is that some genres are meant for a keyboard and mouse. A coworker will argue with me all day that first-person shooters are meant for PC only, but he’s an idiot, so I ignore him. Two genres that I have tried now with a controller that just flat out down work are real-time strategy games (which includes tower defense) and point-and-click adventures.

By nature, point-and-click adventures refer to clicking with a mouse. Of course, the original King’s Quest didn’t use a mouse, but it did use a keyboard for players to tell Sir Graham what he needed to do to solve a certain puzzle. That said, those early games were hard as shit because of how randomized they were, how specific you had to be in how you solved the puzzles, and that awful possibility of reaching a dead end.

Occasionally, games from this genre will attempt a port to console, presumably to sell more copies, bring in a bigger audience, etc. etc. Thus far, any RTS game that I have tried on console has been an abysmal experience, and the only point-and-click games I have enjoyed on console have been the Telltale-style episodic games. I know King’s Quest is available on console, and I think it will work just fine because even the PC game works better with a controller than a keyboard/mouse. My current review for work is one that should have never made the leap to console: The Book of Unwritten Tales 2.

The controls for this game were very much meant with a mouse in mind. They included a couple of functions to make observing items and using items a little easier for a controller, but the game’s character movement with a controller and trying to solve puzzles with this controller makes for a frustrating experience. Only two levels into the game, I reached a puzzle I could not complete because the character physically could not move his ass fast enough. I talked to a friend of mine who reviewed the game on PS4, and she said she couldn’t do that part either; she had to get her husband to help her out. I could get the little bastard into the room he needed to go, but I couldn’t get him to walk the next two feet fast enough before my fire went out and I had to start over.

I remembered that I bought the game earlier in the year when it released on PC because it went on sale, but like most Steam games, it’s sat there and gathered digital dust. I fired it up, played through to this stupid fire puzzle (it’s amazing how much more quickly the game goes when you know the answers to the puzzles), and witnessed how much easier the puzzle was to solve when I only had to double click to get him to leave the room. I didn’t have to wait for him to physically walk, or get the icons to appear when he reached an area; I could just double click on the exit. It was a Christmas miracle.

I understand that Nordic Games was proud of this little point-and-click adventure, and they wanted to push it under as much faces as possible. But not every PC game will port well, such as this genre of gaming. I played Broken Age on my Vita, and that only worked well because of the touch screen. I had already played it on PC, and as such, I can’t imagine going through that with just a controller. The Book of Unwritten Tales 2 probably could have been a decent Vita port thanks to the touchscreen, but it may be too big for the Vita to handle. The PC download size is over 13GB. That might kill my poor memory cards.

So how am I going to review this PS4 copy of the game that recently released? I don’t have a bloody clue. But if this one was on your radar at all, put it in your Steam wishlist and wait for the next big sale. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT attempt this on console.

Personally, I don’t recommend this game at all, but that’s a story for a different day.